Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D.
Licensed Marriage/Family Therapist
Licensed Alcohol/Drug Counselor
405-707-9600
peggyferguson@hotmail.com
http://www.peggyferguson.com
Divorce Articles by Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D., Stillwater, OK
To access the articles, just click on the title of the article. It will open in a separate pdf document that can be saved to your computer and/or printed off. All articles are copyrighted. We welcome you to use them for your own information and to share them with others as long as you cite my authorship,provide website information/link, and do not edit them.
Table of Contents
New: Parenting for the Children During and After Separation and Divorce
New: Developmental Stages of Marriage: Marriage and Divorce at Different Stages
Reasons for Divorce
Divorce Recovery: Knowing What to Expect can Reduce Your Pain
Before You Divorce - Read this!
Falling Out of Love - Should We Get a Divorce?
But I Don't Want A Divorce: What To Do Right Now To Keep Your Spouse From Leaving You
What Happens To Children In Early Divorce
Predicting Your Own Divorce:
Why You Should Never Use the D-Word
Predicting Your Own Divorce:
Why You Should Never Use the D-Word
By Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D.
If you want to give your marriage a chance to recover from whatever is bothering you at the moment, don't use the D-word. Don't say, "I want a divorce" in the heat of an argument. Don't use it as a punishment, a threat, a dirty fight tactic, or as a joke. When you do, you are setting the stage for that very thing to come true. To read the rest of this article follow this link: Predicting Your Own Divorce:Why You Should Never Use the D-Word
Parenting for the Children During and After
Separation or Divorce
Unresolved conflicts are often the justification of separation and divorce and disagreement over parenting may be one of the major conflicts. The longer the unresolved conflicts over the parenting, the more and more diametrically opposed parents become in their approaches. Both parents believe that their own "approach" is right and the other parent's approach is "wrong". When parents disagree on child rearing principles, philosophies and techniques, it is easy to see how those differences could translate into inconsistency and confusion across households. Children may be subjected to two different sets of rules and standards. These differences may be stark "black and white" differences. How confusing would that be? Try to find middle ground instead. To read the rest of this article, follow this link: Parenting for the Children During and After Separation and Divorce
Developmental Stages of Marriage:
Marriage and Divorce at Different Stages
By Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D.
Couples who come in for counseling often think that with a 50% divorce rate, the level of their conflict or pain, and the inability to effectively communicate or problem solve, that they are doomed to divorce and that they might as well get it over with. Rita DeMaria, a family therapist and scholar, points to a different perspective on divorce statistics by framing them within her seven stages of marriage. To read the rest of the article, follow this link: Developmental Stages of Marriage: Marriage and Divorce at Different Stages
Reasons for Divorce
By Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D.
Lists of reasons that people give for getting a divorce are being compiled by family researchers and scholars, attorneys, marriage/family therapists, proponents of political agendas, and demographers. Some of the most frequently cited reasons listed include the following:
- Addiction
- Cheating/infidelity
- Control issues of partner
- Mental health problems
- Physical Violence
- Emotional Violence
- Mistreatment of the Children
- To read the rest of this article follow this link: Reasons for Divorce
Divorce Recovery:
Knowing What to Expect Can Reduce Your Pain
By Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D.
Divorce is an extremely painful process and experience. Most people experience a range of emotions during the process that they often struggle to make sense of and to process through. It is a time of high levels of stress and the bombardment of confusing feelings create a challenge in surviving and coping. Identity is challenged and distorted by feelings and attempts to make sense of those feelings. Self-esteem is compromised and may take some time to recover. People may feel isolated and alone. They may feel shame, guilt, grief, hurt, overwhelmed and many other feelings.
While you are under the most emotional stress of any time in your life you are called upon to be the stabilizing influence and tower of support for your children and sometimes even other family members. Non-custodial parents often fear that they will ultimately lose their children to the other parent and engage in counter-therapeutic conflict behavior over the children. To read the rest of this article, follow this link: Divorce Recovery: Knowing What to Expect can Reduce Your Pain
Before You Divorce - Read This!
Will Divorce Make You Happy?
By Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D.
January and February seem to be a common time for people to get divorced.
While many conflicted and combative couples may have stayed together through the holidays to not disappoint the kids or the extended family members, or have not had the money to get divorced before now, others who find themselves divorced at this time, may have not even been thinking about divorce, until they began to feel discouraged, disappointed, and disenchanted after the holidays. While there are very good reasons for divorce, personal unhappiness may not be caused by your marriage and divorce may not be the solution. To read the rest of this article, follow this link:
Before You Divorce - Read this!
Falling Out of Love – Should We Get A Divorce?
By Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D.
Often when a couple comes in for couple’s counseling, one of the partners is stating that s/he has fallen out of love with the other partner. Sometimes they both feel that way, but usually it is just one spouse verbalizing this. The partner that feels as if s/he has fallen out of love, often questions whether they ever “really” loved their spouse in the first place. There are often other marital issues that the couple is either not acknowledging or have just given up on. To continue reading this article, follow this link: Falling Out of Love - Should We Get a Divorce?
But I Don't Want A Divorce!
What To Do Right Now To Keep Your Spouse From Leaving You and To Build A Better Life Together.
By Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D.
What if you were called into your boss's office and told that s/he was thinking about letting you go, that you were not fulfilling your job responsibilities, and that you were holding the company back rather than helping the company grow and prosper?
Yes, you might be shocked or stunned. You might also already realize that you have not been working any where near your potential, that you have been somewhat disengaged from the company and just "putting in time" until retirement. To read the rest of this article, follow this link: But I Don't Want A Divorce: What To Do Right Now To Keep Your Spouse From Leaving You
What Happens To Children In Early Divorce
By Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D.
No doubt about it; divorce hurts. Everyone concerned usually experiences distress with divorce. Emotional, financial, spiritual, and even physical distress is common for both divorcing parties. The children usually experience fear and confusion, even when they are tired of the parents fighting all the time.
For the kids, it is like their lives have been thrown into the air and they do not know how it is all going to land. Children will have a lot of questions about who they will live with, whether, when, and where they will spend time with the other parent, and whether they will still have access to grandparents and other family members that are important to them. They usually know other children whose parents are divorced and have heard things about others’ experiences that may cause them concern. To read the rest of this article, follow this link: What Happens To Children In Early Divorce
Tags:
Marriage Separation divorce children reasons for divorce I don't want a divorce Should We Get A Divorce Getting a Divorce Divorce recovery Divorcing DIVORCES getting divorced Causes for Divorce Children and Divorce Effects of Divorce on Children Getting A Divorce Early Divorce Separation Divorce With Children
My ebooks and other informational/educational products are available
for purchase on my Services Provided page.
Copyright: Peggy L. Ferguson, Ph.D., 116 W. 7th, Suite 211, Stillwater, OK 74074, phone 405-707-9600, fax 405-707-9601, email peggyferguson@hotmail.com, http://www.peggyferguson..com
Serving Stillwater (74074, 74075, 74076), Perry (73077), Perkins (74059), Cushing (74023), Pawnee (74058), Guthrie (73044), Ponca City (74601, 74602, 74604), Morrison (73061), and other local communities.
More articles will be presented here on divorce, divorce recovery, divorce pain, getting over divorce, healing from divorce, divorce anger, reasons for divorce. Look for titles like, "I don't want a divorce", "Save My Marriage:, "How Do I Save My Marriage", Saving a Marriage", "I want a divorce".
Peggy Ferguson provides services for Alcoholism, Drug Addiction, Chemical Dependency, Sex Addiction, Mental Health Issues, Depression, Anxiety, Stress Management, Addiction Recovery, Drug Abuse, Spouse of sex addict, Relapse prevention, Drug cravings, Family Business Issues, Couple Money Issues, Co-dependency, Adult Children of Alcoholism Issues, Cross-addiction, Co-occurring disorders, marital family therapy, marriage family counseling, step-parenting, step-family issues, couple money issues, grief, mid-life issues, infidelity. Providing individual, group, marriage, family, and couples sessions. Providing professional supervision and training and consultation services.
